Learn how to tell if your child is depressed and the best ways to help

Does your child seem unusually sad, irritable or quiet lately? Such changes in mood could be due to a temporary stress in life. But how do you know if it’s something more? According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the number of children with depression and anxiety has increased over time, and 3.2% of children between the ages of 3 and 17 have a current diagnosis of depression.

Signs of depression in children

Symptoms of depression can vary in children and are different from a temporary change in mood or sadness. If your child displays signs of depression lasting more than two weeks, or if symptoms seem to occur around the same time as certain stressors (such as tests) or at certain times of the week (such as Sunday evenings before the school week starts), anxiety or depression may be the cause.


Signs of depression in children ages 12 and younger may include the following:

  • Decreased interest in favorite activities

  • Difficulty initiating and/or maintaining social relationships

  • Extreme sensitivity to rejection or failure

  • Frequent absences from school and/or a sudden decline in grades

  • Physical symptoms with no medical cause

  • Frequent sadness, tearfulness or crying

  • Hopelessness

  • Low energy

  • Low self-esteem

  • Increased irritability

  • Increased frequency or severity of tantrums (for younger children)

  • Major changes in eating and/or sleeping patterns

  • Obsessive fears or worries about death

  • Social isolation

  • Talking about or attempting to run away from home

  • Thoughts or expressions of suicide or self-harming behavior

  • Trouble concentrating

Signs of depression in adolescents ages 13 to 18 may include all of the above, plus:

  • Increased interest in topics related to death

  • Increased risk-taking behaviors

  • Excessive or inappropriate feelings of guilt

  • Feelings of worthlessness or self-hatred

  • Substance use

  • Short tempered

  • Trouble making decisions

How can I help my child with depression?

If you’re not sure whether your teens are suffering from depression or just dealing with teenage growing pains, consider how long they have been acting this way. How different are they from the way they normally act? Ask yourself if the symptoms and signs are persistent or ongoing? Are they severe? Ask teachers and coaches if they have concerns. Don’t be afraid to directly ask your teens. Say, “I care about you. I’m worried about you. I’m not sure how you’re feeling about yourself. Can we talk about how you’re feeling?” If you’re sensing there is a problem, discuss it with a professional. Even if it is not full-blown depression, sometimes seeing a professional to discuss a problem or difficult situation can be helpful.

Your child's safety is your number one priority

If your child or teen is engaging in behaviors that cause you concern for their immediate safety – such as discussing plans for suicide or other forms of self-harm – immediately take them to the nearest emergency room or call 911. Your child's safety is the top priority. "Better safe than sorry" should be your guiding philosophy in such situations.

Check out these resources for additional information on teen suicide warning signs:

American Psychological Association

American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry

National Institute of Mental Health

JED Foundation

The Trevor Project

If urgent help is needed:

Call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline immediately at: 1-800-273-8255 (TALK)

Text START to 741-741